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Should I have sex with my boyfriend of two years? We have both been thinking we might want to do this. But my in family, they always told me that once a men has sex with you, they wont view you the same anymore. It's like getting "the prize" then turning your back... Is it true if both of us realy love each other? Will it ruin our relationship or make it better?
Do you and your boyfriend go to church or synagogue or mosque together?
Conservative Jews, Christians, and Muslims all object to premarital sex on roughly the same grounds: Sex is a wonderful activity created by God to be reserved for the marriage commitment as a bond between a husband and wife. "And they shall cleave together" is how the Bible puts it.
Sex can create powerful feelings of intimacy, bonding, and pleasure. The world likes to focus on the idea that "well, it feels good, and everyone is going to do it, so go ahead and buy a condom and do it safely."
But sex before marriage can also cause an unmarried couple to stay together when they should not continue together. It can make a breakup more difficult. Having premarital sex can cause additional shame and regret if the relationship doesn't work out. Each of those faith traditions would blaim many relationship problems on the misuse of sex before a couple is married.
You did not mention if either of you are virgins. But you are virgins to each other. Some research says that a couple who engages in 100 hours of alone time together is extremely likely to cross over the line of sexual intimacy. In todays culture, it is rare for a couple, old enough to legally consent to marriage, to make it to two years without engaging in sex, so you have quite an achievement in that.
Carefully consider with your boyfriend if the traditional social support of a church group might improve your relationship's chance of success, and add to the richness of your relation. Before you take the leap and engage in sex, seek out the advice of an experienced youth counsellor or pastor. It will give you some extra perspectives to consider so the both of you can make a more informed choice.